Why are we here?  To be happy?  To be free?  Are they the same?

We are here to “share in the goodness of his (God’s) own blessed life.  For this reason, at every time and in every place, God draws close to man.  He calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all his strength.”  CCC1

We are here to seek God, to know God, and to love God with all of our strength. 

When we do that, sometimes we’ll experience happiness.  But guess what else we’ll experience sometimes?  Suffering and sadness and pain. 

This shouldn’t be a surprise.  Just look to the life of Christ.  Was it all about being happy – or did he sacrifice and suffer here and there? 

What do we really want?  We want freedom.  And as we grow in our seeking God and knowing God, we will find ourselves going to a place beyond happiness or sadness where we find this freedom.  And when we grow in loving him with all of our strength, we’ll find ourselves living the right way no matter how we feel.

Stop chasing happiness.  Instead, try chasing God and find your freedom along the way.

Our parish passes baskets at offertory.  This presents a whole host of fun “mid-game” entertainment for families with children in the 3 – 7 age group.  You know the drill – you can see it coming when the basket gets close.  Arguments over who gets to hold the basket, or if someone gets to hold it for too long or too short, or who has too many “pieces” to put in, or who gets to pass it to the next family – or on special occasions – who gets to pass it to grandpa and grandma. 

Then there’s the stressful moments when you can’t find any pocket change or small bills – and you have to decide, do I give the kid a twenty even though we do the monthly automatic withdrawal and this is all for show?  Or do I pretend I don’t have my wallet or purse and then have to deal with the crying?

This past Sunday, the basket made its way a few pews ahead of us and my wife was ready.  She had some change out for my 4 year old daughter.  The older two have lost interest, and the youngest doesn’t know what’s going on yet, so currently she’s queen of the collection basket.  As she was watching the basket get close, she was getting more and more excited – playfully enjoying the feel of the coins before they went into the basket.  She even taunted her older brother with what she had to give, reliving the good ole’ days when he had more interest. 

And then it happened.

Right as the basket was passed back to my wife, she dropped the change.  She was sitting on my lap, so it was either under her, or under me, or maybe it softly landed on the floor.  Here the basket came – and she was frantically looking for it.  The usher was standing post – as were the families behind us – waiting for that basket.  The mounting stress for my daughter.  The mounting stress for me.  I did what I had to do.  I ended up passing the basket without her contribution. 

Then the tears and sobs came. 

Hats off to her, because she kept looking and was able to find the coins.  When I realized she had found them, I asked, “Honey, do you want to walk back and put them in the basket?”  She softly nodded up and down with tears flowing.  I tried to enlist the oldest to help with this reconnaissance mission – but that was a no go.  And I get it.  We all know that awkward feeling, like you’re doing something wrong, when you leave a pew during mass.

I knew what I had to do.

I picked her up, awkwardly crossed over our pew neighbors, got to the center aisle, and set her down.  I led her back until we found the usher and the basket.  The collection had just gotten over, and he kindly lowered it for her to make her contribution.  All was right in the universe and I was proud of her.

When we got back to the pew, I got to thinking…..

My daughter so wanted to play a part and make her contribution.  And when her chance came – she blew it.  The visceral emotion and pain and loss she felt.  But she didn’t give up and regained what she lost, finding the coins on the floor.  And once she did, the regret set in, which was almost worse.  The feel of that money made the missed opportunity even MORE real and tangible.  She still wanted to make her contribution – to finish the job – but she was afraid.  How in the world would she get to where she needed to go?  From her 4 year old perspective – in this huge church – that basket could have been across the state for all she knew.  She needed someone to help her.  She needed someone who could bring her to the place she so desperately wanted to go, but was too afraid to go alone.

We are all just like my daughter.  We have a contribution we want to make and we are often too scared to make it on our own. 
We want this contribution to be something incredibly meaningful.  We want our lives to matter.  We are all quietly on our own mission to figure this out.  And we all will end up at the same place – realizing our most precious and meaningful contribution is through God and to God.  He is the most meaningful recipient. He created us for Him.  We feel an emptiness and anxiety until we realize this purpose we all share, as His children.  But this is really hard to accept.  Who the heck am I to think God wants me?  I’m a sinner; I’m broken; I feel like I fail and fall more often then I win and stand strong.  We are like my daughter – loose change in hand, dying to give it to the rightful owner and so eager to give of ourselves, and yet so afraid to do the scary work of figuring out how we can give it.
Making this “ultimate” contribution of ourselves to God takes humility and trust.  We have to be okay going to Him, acknowledging our brokenness and utter dependence, and deal with the crazy reality that He actually wants us. 

Good thing we have someone willing to help us.  And who’s that? 

Mary.

Mary brings us to the place we all so desperately want and need to go in order to make our contribution.  She invites us to Him and leads us to Him in a way only she can. 

God wants us so desperately to come to Him – but he can’t force us.  And while deep down we love Him and want to make our contribution – our ego and flesh and brokenness and fear often get in the way.  God knows this.  That’s why He gave himself to us through Mary.  That’s why she’s such a blessing.  That’s why we pray to her.  That’s why we go to her.  She calls us to Him; to the big huge “basket” where we are all called to chip in.

Mary was all flesh and bones like you and me.  She trusted God in every moment in a way that we are all called to do.  There’s nothing scary about Mary. And that’s what I have learned to cherish about her.

So let’s not ever keep ourselves from God. We have Mary.  She can lead us through the awkwardness.  Let’s pray to her.  Just like with my daughter, we can let her lead us to the place we know we need to go to make our contribution.

My now 7 year old son is beginning his 3rd year of basketball.  Say what?  Yes, his third year.  He started playing when he was in Kindergarten. 

Three years ago when my wife asked if we wanted him to play basketball I was dumbfounded.  There was a league for kids in kindergarten?  Who in the world would be crazy enough to work with kids that young to play basketball?  And what’s the point?  He couldn’t dribble, he couldn’t get the ball even close to a well lowered hoop, he couldn’t throw a ball.

The league he plays in is called UPWARD (www.upward.org) And do you know what UPWARD proves to me?  That miracles are waiting on us.

How am I defining a miracle?  A miracle is something that would not be created or manifested without God.

UPWARD’s mission is “Promoting the Discovery of Jesus through Sports.” (http://www.upward.org/about/about-upward-sports)

After watching my son play basketball for two years in this program, I have seen the consistent value it provides him. And now it all makes sense.
Who else would have the desire and commitment and tenacity and patience and vision to be crazy enough to think something like this would work – but those committed to something significant?
 
Who else would be willing to find the coaches and the volunteers and build the teams of committed adults willing to be part of something – other than those committed to something significant?

Is it any wonder there are so few organizations and leagues that get kids involved so young?

The rational person would think – like I did – what’s the point of a kindergartner playing basketball? And do you know who else isn’t rational?  Anyone willing to surrender themselves to God.

Before each UPWARD basketball game there is a prayer.  At halftime there is a short talk to the adults that often references scripture.  It is interesting to watch how awkward most of us are, in a gym on a Saturday, listening to someone proclaim their love of God.  But you know what?  It wouldn’t be so awkward if we allowed more miracles like UPWARD to exist.  We would be more used to it.

What would happen if we got better and better at surrendering to God?  If we were so willing to go into the world and do the right thing – trusting Him every step?  What businesses would thrive?  What schools would thrive? What churches would thrive? What organizations would thrive? What families would thrive?  What opportunities would be created? What problems would be solved if we stopped thinking rationally – but instead - as simple children so devoted to doing the right things for others because of our love and gratitude and commitment to God.

My children love UPWARD.  And I do too.  And UPWARD made me realize how many miracles are waiting on us.
 

There are two ways to live, and they are black and white and mutually exclusive.  We are either a “giver” or a “taker.”  Being a taker is our natrual state.  Without time in prayer, reflection, and silence you may be unable to see that you are a taker.  I'm a "taker" more than I'd like to admit.  This is because our world is all about taking. Taking is often covered up with worry and anxiety.  We’re too worried about what’s going to happen or why something happened that we play it safe and hide from really giving of ourselves in thought and action to our relationships or work or projects.  We do this hoping no one finds out who we are– and usually they don’t - because most people are also busy living that way.  It’s like we are mice hoping to sneak a piece of food off the floor when nobody’s looking.  We’re not given the food – we sneak and quickly take it – as “takers” are want to do.

The less common thing is being a “giver.”  This is about trusting that what’s going to happen or why something happened will always lead to good things.  And truly, I don’t know how people live without realizing this path is possible for them.  Life is brutal without it.  Unlike taking, giving is about freedom and trust and love.  The great news is that as you get accustomed to this path it can become addictive.  You don’t play life safely; rather, you play it kind of recklessly.  You give and give and give, knowing you have nothing to worry about.  Here you are NOT the prodigal son, saying, “Hey, that’s not fair.”  Here you are trusting life and God and what you’ve been given because you know all you have to do is trust – and when you do – you give.  Here you are living Mother Teresa’s quote – "God does not require that we be successful only that we be faithful."  And this is lived everywhere – at work, in our relationships, in our projects, in our all.

Here’s the kicker – when you give, you then are open to receiving.  There’s no more taking. You’ll actually receive more than you could ever “take.”  You have to try living this to prove it to yourself.  And its easier said then done, because it is scary to live recklessly, giving it all away.  Until you get addicted to the rush.
​
Sick of worry and anxiety?  I know I am.  Take your faith seriously and try living recklessly.  Give and give and give and you’ll be able to receive and never have to worry about what you have to take.

Within all of us, way deep down, is an emptiness that quietly nags at us.  And the only thing that can fill this emptiness is God.  I think most of us are aware of this emptiness to some degree.  We come face to face with it in the silence.
 
St. Augustine talked about this in terms of our restless hearts, famously saying “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.”

In one of Mother Teresa’s letters, she writes, “There is so much deep contradiction in my soul. Such deep longing for God - so deep that it is painful - a suffering continual”

​All of us endlessly long to be filled.  We long to be filled to the brim in a way that satiates us forever. For too many, this emptiness is covered up with a whole host of things - addictions, creature comforts, social media, hobbies and interests that become mildly obsessive.

If you look at our world, where do people focus their energy?  We focus on avoiding all things that feel negative, which would certainly include nagging emptiness. We can’t blame anyone.  No one really talks about this emptiness.  We might read about it in the lives of the saints or in some heavy-handed spiritual reading, but it’s certainly not part of a conversation that is out there happening in regular day-to-day life.  We simply don’t talk about it. In our shallow attempt to live lives that are positive and happy – we avoid the truth about what our lives are really all about.  And in doing so, we cut ourselves off from perhaps the most beautiful reality that exists in being human; our deep and desperate desire to be filled with God.

It is this emptiness and this desire that is perhaps the most beautiful collective gift we all share because we can feel it and see it in our very existence while being alongside each other.  All we have to do is slow down, ask ourselves what we’re really doing with our lives, and we will get to a place where we realize we’re busy doing a whole bunch of stuff that doesn’t really matter.  And then, in that lonely place, we ask ourselves, "What really matters?"  That’s when the good stuff enters.  That’s when going to church or to our knees or smiling at strangers or writing a quick thank you letter makes all the sense in the world. 

​Let’s not pretend we’re okay living a shallow life rooted in surface level feeling and action.  Let’s go to the places that really matter.  Let’s own the fact that we desperately want to be filled.  Let’s be bold enough to grant God the pleasure of hearing us say, “God, I love you and want all of you.  Please wash me and fill me.”  Let’s give ourselves away constantly and watch what happens.  

​Commitments reveal our weaknesses, our humanness, our depravity, and the fact that left to our own devices we will struggle mightily.  We need to depend on God.  We were created for it.  And our dependence on Him is the only real method to keeping our most precious commitments. But we fight against it.  We are so trained to think that revealing our weaknesses and being dependent is bad.  We’re trained to think that commitments limit us and prevent us from really being free.

But, is that true?

What areas of your life feel a bit empty or lost or out of control?  And if you look at those areas, are there any commitments that you could be making that you haven’t – or that you should have made but didn’t – or that you have made and simply aren’t keeping?  Your head should be nodding up and down.

Because you’re just like me.

When we understand that we are weak and need God, we become bold and courageous.  We don’t force ourselves into action to keep our commitments, rather, in humility and thankfulness we just keep moving forward, keeping our chins up and hearts open.  It is in this childlike reality that real freedom and joy in living is found.

Freedom is only found in God.  Until we accept this we won’t be filled. And we will fight against our commitments.  Once we accept this – we will see our work in keeping commitments as beautiful gifts to God.  Because we need him terribly and totally.

So make commitments.  Work hard to keep them.  And keep all of the focus on God.  Because really, He’s all we need.

​Doing your special thing takes courage.  That’s because its “your” special thing.  If everyone could do it, not only would it not be special, but because everyone else was doing it, it wouldn’t take courage.

One of the most challenging realities of our lives is to realize that our special thing, which may be a path we have been avoiding, is the path we must take. If we are not careful, we will spend the rest of our lives avoiding instead of doing; avoiding because our path can be a lonely place.

I write songs.  I have written them for as far back as I can remember.  It took me 40 years to realize that this is a special thing.
For me to take these songs and put them out into the world for others to hear takes immense courage. What if you don't like my song? Or my singing? Or my words?  Or the production value? Or my guitar playing? Or my arrangement? Or .......

Ask yourself - what is to you what my songs are to me?  What are you NOT putting out into the world?  What special thing do you have ( and you do) that you are avoiding?

And be careful - because your special thing is probably something you just do – and you might not know that its special.  It more than likely comes so naturally to you - you have lost perspective on realizing how special it is.  And those closest to you - they are done telling you how great it is - because its so much a part of you - they don't think to tell you anymore.   

You may think there’s no need to put your special thing out there.  I used to think, “Maybe my songs aren’t that good?” and  “Isn’t it selfish to assume other people are going to like my songs? Who am I to put them out there? What's the point?"
 
What I was missing – and what you might be missing – is that putting your special thing out there should not be done based on what you think other people will think.  Why?  Because its YOUR special thing.  They haven’t heard it, seen it, tasted it, smelled it, or experienced it yet.  Chances are they WON’T like it right away. Because it feels different. The question is, will you be courageous and put it out there? 

If I don’t risk putting my special thing out there, and you don’t risk putting your special thing out there, we will live in a world where there aren't any special things.  And if that's the case - we all might as well go straight to the grave.

Take a risk.  Put your special thing into the world and lead others to do the same.
 

We are all the same. We want to be loved and affirmed. We want to feel joy and engage with life. We want our lives to reflect meaning and goodness. We want to be happy. We might look different from the outside, but on the inside, we are all the same. I'll bet you agree.
 
We have been on this planet for thousands of years and we still have not figured this out.  Look at the way we live our lives and the troubles we face. You would assume we are all so different, and that it is our skin color or culture or gender or religion or upbringing that makes us this way.  We treat people we know as if we are strangers.  How many people in your life do you REALLY open up to?  What part of this reality is rooted in the fact that we haven’t realized our hearts desires are all the same?  I'll bet your next door neighbor wants the very same things you want - way deep down.
 
 Love God and love your neighbor as yourself.  I used to ask myself, "What if my neighbor doesn't want to be loved like me?" and "Isn't that kind of selfish to think I know how my neighbor should be loved?"  What I was missing was that my neighbor and I want the same thing. I know how to love them because it's written deeply within me.
 
If we continue to lead lives of quiet desperation, waiting for someone else to reach out,  or waiting for someone else to go out into the world living their truth first so that we can follow, we will never get there.
 
Be courageous today. Take a risk. Engage with the grocery clerk and the ticketing agent and the passerby. Congratulate and thank people. Look them in the eyes and connect with them. Tell your spouse you love them and let your hug linger a little bit longer. Hold hands with your children or grandchildren and let that touch connect you with the world around you and the privilege that we all have.
 
If I boil it down, the whole point of Jesus' life on earth was to say - I got this; now go help other people get it too.
 
So let's go out and give it away. Let's live like we mean it; for others and the truth we all share.

Forgiving unconditionally should be easy.  That's because 99% of the time there is something we are at least somewhat responsible for in the situation -- directly or indirectly.

Most of us know this is true.  Don't we?

Think of all the things that make us angry or upset -- whether spitting mad angry or only mildly annoyed.

In almost all of them we are at least somewhat responsible. 

When I see people get REALLY upset while driving - maybe they get cut off or maybe someone takes their parking spot or whatever it might be - I wonder what it takes to get THAT upset. 

When I think back on myself, and times that I get REALLY upset with my wife or children -- what really is the problem?  In the moment I wouldn't want to admit it.....but there's something I'm at fault for too.  Whether I didn't communicate something clearly enough up front, whether I've allowed the relationship to be what it is because I'm too lazy or rushed to have properly facilitated something from the get go, whether I'm stressed or anxious because I didn't get something done right the first time at work and now I'm a complete jerk and on edge.

If I don't forgive people, I'm really just a jerk.  I'm someone who thinks I'm 100% right all the time.  I'm someone who thinks I'm perfect.  I'm someone who thinks I never make mistakes. 

Isn't it amazing, truly, how many people -- like me -- struggle to say, "I'm sorry." 

Don't be a jerk.  Be expert at saying I'm sorry.  Heaven isn't a place for know it all's.  It's a place for I'm sorry.


 

The message of the gospel is simple.  Go out and really, truly live.

Be free.  Be happy.  Be at peace.  Unconditionally and always.

Don't be afraid.  Don't be angry.  Don't feel guilty.  Don't be jealous.  Don't be sad.  Don't be worried.  Don't dwell in the future.  Don't dwell in the past.

Just live.

Why?

Because God created us.  God wants us to share in His life.  Don't think that's true?  Then try to get your head around the fact that God really walked the earth 2,000 years ago.  His name was Jesus.  Everyone knows He was here.  The only thing up for discussion is if He really was the son of God.  I know He was.  There's a good chance you probably do, too.

What should we do with that?

We should be human.  We should be who we were born to be.  We should be a child of God.  We should be like Christ.

Choose to live in freedom.  Choose to live in peace.  Choose to live in love.

When it's hard to live in freedom or in peace or in love, put whatever is preventing that real living from happening, and either pin it to the cross or give it to God or both.

​Go out and really, truly live.